DEAR ABBY: My brother’s daughter “Alyssa,” an only child, is on the kidney transplant list.
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My brother and I haven’t spoken for 10 years, mainly because of how poorly he treated our late parents.
When I had my DNA tested, I learned that he had fathered another child. The information and facts this woman (“Bree”) has provided ring true and are very believable. I have no doubt Bree is his daughter.
She had some questions related to health issues because she has children of her own.
Unfortunately, my irresponsible brother turned his back on her, and she does not want to pursue a relationship with him or with me.
Should I continue to honor her request, or tell her about her half-sister who needs the transplant?
— INVOLVED AUNT IN FLORIDA
DEAR AUNT: If you think it might help Alyssa, inform Bree about Alyssa’s need for a kidney transplant. There is, however, no guarantee that Bree’s kidney would be a match.
Do not be surprised if Bree responds negatively (or not at all), considering her lack of a relationship with her father or the rest of your family. I wish you luck on your search.
DEAR ABBY: I have been in a text relationship for nearly a year. I call it a text relationship because we communicate solely through texting.
Because I’m not a video chat person, it doesn’t bother me that we don’t Zoom. Additionally, the few times he has tried to contact me via video, we just don’t seem to connect.
Even though our communication is strictly via text, we have formed this bond where we are very in tune with one another. He knows when I’m happy or sad and need cheering up, and vice versa. All the things you could want in a relationship, we seem to have.
He travels a lot because of his job, so I don’t see him in person. Again, that’s not a problem for me.
My problem is, even though he has much more money than I’ll ever have, he often asks me to send him money mostly to play games while he is away. I start out by saying I can’t help, but then I give in.
By the way, I never ask him for anything. I’m not a “gimme” woman. I will find a way to get it myself.
It’s beginning (I guess it always has) to bother me that he asks me for money (he doesn’t ask for anything else). I don’t know how to tell him I wish he wouldn’t do that and to ask one of his rich friends instead.
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How can I rectify this dilemma I’ve created for myself?
— UNEASY IN MARYLAND
DEAR UNEASY: If you are asking sincerely how to rectify this unfortunate situation, stop texting him and do not send him another penny!
If you follow this advice, I promise this gamer will disappear like a wisp of smoke once he realizes the money tree has wilted. You’ve been had, my dear. I hope it wasn’t for more than you could afford.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.